My daughter has a shovel ready project in Charlotte, NC that is in dire need of funding so I am reaching out to the Treasury in an attempt to siphon some of my share of the money from TARP so that our economy here can continue it's metoric rise.  Here's the situation:

     It seems that she and her boyfriend of longstanding were touring pet shops in Austin, Texas a few weeks ago, and were ensnarred by a boxful of bunnies in the front window.  Her boyfriend, who I really like, bought her a bunny.  Because they are both seniors at UT, in love, and being supported by parents, they by design have a short time horizon they are looking at.  In the case of the bunny, it was almost as if they were looking backward.  In any event, we have sort of a temporary care giving program going on for the bunny in Austin while they are home on spring break. 

   The dilemma is what to do when school is out.  Those of you who have had bunnies before know that there is a direct relationship between bunny smell and the growth of the bunny.  So, my fear is that by the end of the summer, her room smells like something off a stage set for Animal Planet, and the cats, now alerted by the presence of a captive bunny, start circling her room like something off Shark Week.  As optimistic as I am, I do not see a good outcome here: Either the cats figure out a way to break the door down to her room, or what I think is chicken picatta one night for dinner is neither.

    So, here's what I'd like:  I'd like $200 from Treasury to help pay for the materials, wire, food, stone, "green' bunny doody waste disposal system, and hourly wage for my illegal alien "bunny containment" specialist.  We have a place near the pool where we can put the facility.  It's shaded and cool, has an outlet to hook up a fan for the  hotter months, etc.  I believe that we can bring the entire project in for that amount or less and not withstanding the size of the bunny, no earmarks are necessary at this point.  My vet has agreed to check on the bunny for free thus creating a constructive extra benefit that costs the Treasury no extra money.  See, it can be a perfect world when you work and play together with other people.

    Just so you as a taxpayer can rest assured that there is no waste in the $200 figure, I have asked the risk managers at AIG to do an assessment of what would happen if this project would fail.  They have assured me that as soon as they can find one of the managers who took the retention bonus they will get right back to me.