I think the decision by the Catholic Church to psychologically test its priests prior to admitting them into their program is a great one.  I just wonder if they are going to back test to see if it works.  I know all this is difficult for the Church so I thought I would help them out with some beginning questions: The would be Priest would select one answer from each category.

1. When did you decide to become a priest:  

    a. When my boyfriend and I broke up.

    b. When the boy I was seeing went to middle school.

    c.  When I couldn't be a cheerleader

    d.  When I didn't get into the Astronaut Program

2. Are you uncomfortable with being alone with young men?

    a. Only if one of us is naked

    b. If there are more than four and we are naked 

    c. Only if small animals are involved

    d. Only if I have to be the Hunter Robot

3. If someone showed affection to you in a counseling session, how would you react:

    a.  Good if they had flowers.

    b.  Bad, flowers or not

    c.  I wouldn't be affected

    d. How is that different than now?

4. Could you admit it if your feelings were getting beyond your ability to control them:

    a. Before or after I lost control?

    b. Sure, right after I show you my working Tax Return Documents

    c.  Absolutely.  I would never take more than 4-6 hours to try and control them.

    d. Sure, like right now, I'd like to choke the life out of you but I need this job.

5. What attracted you most to the Priesthood:

    a. free room, board, and laundry

    b. the opportunity to be a public speaker

    c.  All the neat crosses you get

    d.  Steady paycheck

6.  Describe your ideal living situation:

     a. Lots of floor to ceiling mirrors

     b. Gothic Design with places to hang things

     c. I didn't know housing was included with the job

     d. A secret room behind the bookcase.

7.  Describe your greatest fear professionally:

     a. Hidden cameras

     b. Being trapped with only  The Sound of Music DVD

     c. No chance for advancement

     d. Crushed velvet robes make a comeback

 I know that the Vatican will do an exhaustive analysis of future Priesthood candidates because they have no more real estate to sell to pay off the victims of bad ones.  Hope my contribution on these questions help.